Formal affair

Tomorrow is the formal. The last time I went to a group formal was literally 36 hours before Holly was born. I was having contractions that night and Aaron's family was there in rememberance of him. I remember thinking of Holly's name that night. Her name was going to be either Allison or Sabrina. (Allison was the name that Bethany and Ashley came up with because of "Allison Wonderland". They thought her last name was wonderland...I loved it because of that and because it's a cute name.) Anyway, I wore a pantsuit. 2 other very pregnant ladies were there and were supposed to wear pantsuits also and they both got dresses that day...traders. It was a fun night though. I remember I kept thinking, "I hope I don't get to go" because I was ready to have her...I'm glad I did though. Who knew it would be my last group formal. 4 years ago. It's been bittersweet seeing all the girls talking about their dresses this week (a lot of them take their children to the same preschool Holly goes to, so I'm aware, but not involved of the going's on in the battalion.) Now that I'm back to my "normal" weight and would love to go and feel confident in a dress again, I'll never go to another. Wow, so much to lose...it's stupid to feel that way, but the Army life was fun. It has been hard, but there have been so many fun things that we've been involved in and a part of. I'm going to miss the ceremonies probably the most. I always feel so proud of David at them...he has accomplished so much in his career, he has so much to be proud of. He had been an amazing leader, admired and respected by many. He has been on a great path of success in his military career. I've truly enjoyed watching him succeed time and time again. His kids had someone to honor, respect and be so proud of. Unfortunately, they probably won't see a lot of that anymore, and if they do, it won't mean as much because they won't be a part of it as much anymore. They won't suffer the long deployments as much because he won't be coming home to them, they won't see the wonderful ceremonies as often because they'll be living with me. They won't get out of school to see the amazing accomplishments because it will be a long traveling time...what changes. How sad.

My girlfriend sent me this link that seems to pertain a little to our situation...hit pause on the playlist at the bottom and listen...it's beautiful!